Car line parents are assholes

I am so bad at this lately.

Like, I must be the shittiest "blogger" out there. But I have an excuse.

Pre-K ate my life. Or at the very least, pre-K is mostly to blame.

For real, this afternoon class thing is not my favorite thing ever and I'm already hoping Charlotte is lucky enough to be in the morning class when she starts next year. I adore that Josie was fortunate enough to get into the UPK program in our district because the cost of private pre-school is kind of ridiculous and, quite frankly, not something we can afford.

It's just the afternoon part I don't care for and really it's for selfish reasons. The girls and I used to go to the gym at least three times a week in the morning, but considering we'd usually get there around 9:30 a.m. and head home by 10:45, it would leave very little time for "down time" before leaving for school at 12:05 p.m. ... so we haven't gone to the gym. Lord help my fluffy ass, we're going to figure this out and hopefully start going after school, but then that cuts into dinner making time and now with the time change it's dark by 5 p.m. and therefore I'm exhausted.

It's a major dilemma in my brain.

But not as big a dilemma as how to reign in my anger with car line.

"Back to School" scavenger hunt

It was never like this when I was growing up.

We'd walk into Ames and get our new backpacks and packs of loose leaf paper and paper folders. Then wander into the clothing department and find some acid wash jeans our mother refused to buy and some Garth Brooks looking shirt circa 1993. You know what I'm talking about:

I totally had four one similar to that. No shame.

The whole experience took maybe 45 minutes, longer if I was feeling extra miserable about the sneakers I wanted, and there were two of us to outfit. Two girls.

Fast forward to 2014 and shopping for my own kids: Want to know how long I spent in Wal-Mart searching for like five items on the Pre-K school supply list? Like two. Two mother effing hours. We didn't even buy new outfits and I couldn't find three of the items I needed. Who specifically requests "9x12 manila drawing paper"?

It prompted impulse purchases including a bottle of Vitamin D, a giant bag of peanut M&Ms (which were gone the next day because stress), two little boxes of Goldfish Crackers and new coloring books.

Growing pains and change

My free moments have been few and far between lately. Interruptions, events, appointments, deliveries, more interruptions.

Father's Day weekend started with a dance recital and birthday celebration. I'm still trying to grasp the concept that Josie is officially a 4-year-old.

We did the Father's Day run around where we didn't actually do anything special, but it was special because we were together.

Baby's First Haircut ... it still counts even if she's 4, right?

Then it was a week of doctor appointments, getting Josie registered for the Universal Pre-Kindergarten program offered by our school district (again, her being old enough to go to school is a concept I'm not fully grasping), actually celebrating Josie's birthday by taking her for her first hair cut, having the giant mattress delivered and our anniversary.

Our anniversary, which we did nothing special to celebrate other than bust ass to continue getting the house we need to sell ready for showings. After months and months and months of talking about how we needed to list it and all the things we need to do to get it ready, it's ready. Almost. As I sit here taking 15 minutes to pour my thoughts out on the interwebs, the Boy has taken a ladder and gone to paint the door frame on the back of the house and the supports on the front, maybe touch up the paint in the bathroom that I didn't get to and put the light cover back in the front light.

It's officially on the market and open for showing as of June 30.

The preschool (non)dilemma

It's really taking its toll on me this morning. I just need to know. Am I a shitty mom for not sending Josie to preschool?

Please tell me, I'm not the only one with a 3-year-old who's just chilling out watching Dinosaur Train while she has her morning quota of milk and after-breakfast snacks. I'm only panicking over this because I feel like most of my social network feeds are filled with pictures of kids going off to first days of preschool - they're all dressed up cute and have little backpacks and fancy shoes.

And my kid is curled up in jammies still at 10 a.m. while Dr. Scott talks about the stegosaurus and the Pteranodon family goes on another adventure.

We have our reasons for not doing preschool this year, and possibly not doing it next year either when she'll be 4, and like us everyone chooses to send a child to preschool or not for their own reasons.

WTF! She knows her ABCs

Somehow Josie knows her ABCs.

It's absolutely horrible, but I'm not even sure where she learned them. These are bad habits to break.

Next thing you know she'll know how to spell and my life will forever be destroyed. I will never be allowed to plan a surprise trip to get I-C-E-C-R-E-A-M again and forget going to the P-L-A-Y-G-R-O-U-N-D.

Sure, it's entirely possible that my incessant singing of the little ditty drilled it into the ever-changing landscape of grey matter inside her noggin. Or it could have been any one of the LeapFrog toys she plays with in conjunction with the LeapFrog videos on Netflix she's obsessed with. It could even be my mad immersion techniques where I have forced my kids to go to the Y and have fun (I know! I'm such a bad parent) and the amazing childcare staff has given a push in the preschool education department. Someone should buy them cookies.